The song

I'm really fairly zoned out with the whole tired thing, but I've blahhed the uni junk out (which I have been meaning to do for a while now) it was a pretty shoddy job but it's gotten the immediacy (that's really not a word) off the plate. I can't not mention Young Adults tonight. Peter isn't back yet from some conference so Ross and Andrew ran it. Woah what a fantastic evening. Had an 'activity' to get us talking about how we can describe God then watched the Rythym - Nooma video which, like other Nooma's was utterly fantastic. Then well over an hour of solid discussions around God. Questions and answers and theories and metaphors and ideas and concerns. I was slightly blown away with the feeling of this is how it should be. I confess some of it hit home pretty well as I've been battling with the 'knowing God' thing for a while now. Not so much with the head knowledge, I've got plenty of that - but with the um I guess heart kind of stuff. Whether it answered any questions I don't really know. If you throw yourself on a scale of being perfectly in tune with God in the middle you can sit either side with the head (almost Pharisee notion as I described it) on one side,

"There are people who talk as if they know everything about being a Christian and yet seem way out of tune."

and the all I'm just "in love" with God I don't really have the need to search it out more on the other side. Before you critique the scale, we already did VERY thoroughly, I'm just using it as my example. Anyway, if the scale was perfectly sound (which it isn't) I would and have definitely been a bit too far on the 'all knowing' end of things and been a bit stuck on moving right. See the diagram which I'm about to attempt to draw with keystrokes: ~head too much ----------------in tune -----------------heart too much~ In some ways imoho I think it's almost harder to see where to move from head to the middle than the other direction. The 'all heart' business is a concious descision to actually seek the knowing (tangible/theological) stuff and it's well - quite directional. I'm still at a bit of a loss, but in some ways this evening smoothed things out a bit more. We discussed for a long time the metaphor of a song for God. It's beautiful when you look at the possibilities and some of the things people had to share, but it is of course a metaphor and is thus restricted. I was very encouraged, despite being dead tired. This is how I like and I think small group stuff should work. I feel quite at home to speak up, despite it taking an age to formulate my thoughts into words (as it always does). I got to chat with Tim afterwards, this is Tim the outdoor ed. one not the IT one (or the blonde/loudish one as opposed to the dark/quieter one). I was quite amused at the whole thing really, we were talking mostly about how it went and I confess not a lot was sinking in as my head was so wrecked, I was doing my best. I really like when I can start picking out what kind of person I'm talking to, be it my throw back to my Myers Briggs freak phase or not. Anyway he said the word 'feel' about 5 times in a short period and then asked me something how I felt of things being done differently. I couldn't resist dropping in a quick line about how I think first not feel. Oh yes, I'll just amuse myself by playing with people's heads. I don't think he got it, but hey. And now my head has just about had it. So I think it's time to knock off and hopefully forget about the 8hrs of work I have to endure tomorrow.